“Help! I Don’t Desire God!”

Aug 16 2015

A quick shot after church on Sunday

As I look back on the boyfriends I had sex with, I realize it was easy to stay in those relationships of idolatry because of my desires.

Once the desire was gone, it was easier to separate myself from relationships I knew I shouldn’t have been in.

Now, as a woman who’s been living for Christ for the past few years, I’ve come to understand that desire isn’t just important with boyfriends, it’s important in my relationship with God, too.

Women often ask me, “How do I have a relationship with God?”

My response: Like any relationship, you have to build your desire for Him.

Desire is the fuel of any relationship. It’s oftentimes what keeps the relationship going. I didn’t just sleep around because it felt good. I did it because of the desire.

So, if desire can make us stick around for the wrong reasons, how much more can it do for the right reasons with God?

How much do you want God?

God doesn’t want you to go to church, read your Bible and pray just because it seems like the “right” thing to do.

That’s the equivalent of some dude staying with you only because he doesn’t want to leave you.

That’s not a relationship!

God wants you to want Him. He wants you to want to pray, to read the Word and spend time with Him.

Yes, it’s possible to have a strong desire for the Lord.

In fact, we should always feel totally in love with God. That strong, close feeling you have for Him after you first accept Christ, go to a conference or hear a great sermon shouldn’t last for just that moment.

So, if you want to build your relationship and prayer life with God, I have some tips for you. Here’s what I did to build my desire for the Lord:

1) Get out of routine – I definitely recommend giving God the first and lasts part of your day. But, I learned that staying in a routine causes me to see my relationship with God as just that- a routine. Routines can quickly become boring! So, I’ve begun to spice things up with Him. I’ll have random quiet time with Him during the day. I may step aside from work, go to the bathroom and just start praising Him. Be creative and spontaneous! If you don’t know how to spend time with God, read my tips here: How to Spend Time with God.

2) Pray longer – I’ve learned that there’s no better way to get excited about being with God than to spend more time with Him. Think about how you feel after you start spending more time with your boo. The hours you spend on the phone and hanging out all fuel your desire for him. God is no different. If you want a deeper, more intimate relationship with Him, try clearing your whole schedule after work just to pray. After I’ve gotten up from prayer for 5 or 6 hours, my spirit feels so stirred up for God that I don’t want to leave His presence! There’s no greater feeling than wanting more of God! If you don’t know how to pray, read my blog How to Deepen Your Prayer Life to read my tips.

3) Sing to God – God loves it when we sing to Him! I don’t have the best singing voice so it doesn’t matter how you sound. But, there’s something about praising Him through a song that gives you a closer, stronger desire for His presence. He really loves it when we make up our own song. If you ever find yourself worried or stressed, just start singing your own song to God and watch how quickly you gain peace!

Like any relationship, when the fire dies down, it’s easier to step out and fall into temptation. So, if you’ve found yourself having difficulty trusting and obeying God, your lack of desire for Him could be the problem.

Are you really serving God because you want to? Or have you just gotten stuck in a routine because it feels morally correct?

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