Anybody Else Want to End the Cycle of Toxic Relationships?
In one relationship, I remember dating this guy in college.
The whole relationship started in a toxic mess and it continued that way for another two years.
We went out drinking one night, slept together, and built an attraction off of lust.
From that point on, we were inseparable. We were always clubbing together, drinking together, or having sex.
I had gotten wrapped into a ball of lust that I would soon begin to sink into.
During my junior year of college, I decided to study abroad and we began a long distance relationship.
Little did I know, while I was thousands of miles away, he was cheating on me.
Soon, he called me crying, saying he was lonely, and begging for forgiveness.
Out of insecurity, I took him back.
When I got back from studying abroad, our toxic relationship only continued.
We moved in together, began arguing a lot, and before I knew it, I was checking his phone often.
I was constantly looking for any dirt I could find.
Then one day while scrolling through the text messages in his phone, I found what I was looking for. It was a “sext” message from another man.
There you have it. My toxic relationship was worse than I realized.
Not only was this guy cheating on me, but he was battling homosexual desires.
Let me tell you something.
With everything within me, I want you to avoid the foolish, toxic relationships that I had.
I don’t want you to be blinded by guys that say they go to church or love God, but then they still try to sleep with you.
I’ve been there, done that, and wrote a book about it. (Literally, I have wrote a book about it! You can read the sample here: I Believe in God, Now What? )
From experience, I can tell you that the life of toxic relationships without God isn’t one you want.
So, for the next few blogs, I’ll be revealing the secrets that God has taught me over the years that helped me to end my cycle of toxic relationships.
The first secret is this: hunger for God can keep you from the wrong relationship.
When I was wrapped up in those negative relationships, I wasn’t hungry for God.
I was going to church and I called myself “saved” but I wasn’t truly hungry for a relationship with Him. I didn’t have a strong desire for His Word.
Think of it this way.
When you’re really hungry in a grocery store, you’re more likely likely to buy things you don’t need because your appetite is strong.
Yet, when you go into the grocery store already full, you already know what you want and you’re less likely to just pick any old thing off the shelf.
Relationships and God are no different.
When you are hungry for the Lord, He’ll fill you with righteousness.
When you’re full of the Lord, you know what you want in life, relationships, and for your destiny. You are hungry for Him, so you are less likely to pick out any old thing that looks good in a pair of pants. You have a “list” and you stick to it.
Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled. Matthew 5:6, KJV
If you find yourself in toxic relationships, I encourage you to examine your hunger for God. Yes, you go to church and serve in ministries, but do you truly desire the Lord? Or is your relationship with Him just a routine?
Next week, I’ll reveal another secret to end toxic relationships that the Lord has revealed to me over the years.
Have you read my free book sample? It shares my testimony of overcoming toxic relationships, promiscuity, depression, a suicidal attempt, addiction, and much more. It’s free for a limited time: click here to read the sample of I Believe in God, Now What?
Comment below…I’d love to hear your thoughts.
Love,
Im literally battling this exact thing. God is such an on time God. My heart is broken because of my decisions, I just broke off an engagement I initially thought would never end this way. I am really looking forward to this because I’m so heart broken about the toxicity I’ve allowed in my life because of the desire to feel “love” when it was everything but love trying to disguise itself as such.
Aw praise God that you had the courage to leave! I’ve definitely been there but from experience I can tell you that God birthed so much out of me during my break up season . He taught me how to be myself and matured me to become the wife I am today . See it as a preparation season for something greater. I encourage you to take all your time to nurture the gifts and calling on your life right now . I wrote a whole devotional during my break up! Spend ample time with God and turn all that pain into a desire for Him like never before. Email me if you have questions. Love you! And remember you aren’t alone because you have Him!!